Our cops are now custodians of our cash!

Sounds bizarre but it is a fact as the headline goes in TOI Ahmedabad: ATMs in Police Stations soon. Banks in Gujarat are planning to install ATMs in the police stations. Now our green bucks are in safe hands as the state home department and Reserve Bank of India have come up with a solution to stop burglary of ATMs. Thanks to our state police’s generosity that in near future we will be visiting police stations frequently – not for any other reason but to withdraw money!

For some, this news tickles their funny bones in that this new facility would allow us to withdraw money from ATMs planted in police stations – a place that has lost its sanctity because police and bribery are inextricably linked together. (By the way, you don’t need to grease palms of those officials to withdraw your own money, because your bank has already promised the home department to furnish those stations with CCTV cameras, water coolers, furniture and other facilities).

But every cloud has a silver lining. Why can’t we see positives and some other useful services in future? Earlier our police had to burn rubber (and fat) to hunt and catch hold of those criminals. With this new solution, we would help the khaki by placing the apple of discord (ATMs) in police stations so that they don’t have to chase culprits (save fuel, save fat, right?). It is a good start with ATMs; maybe after a year, banks would float a new scheme: leave your precious jewellery in police stations and pay them rent as long as your jewellery is under the vigilant eyes of cops. You might wonder – can we deposit anything that is likely to be snatched from us? Yes, everything.

This move has encouraged a rich couple, who are now flirting with the idea of putting their 5-year old kid into police station as they are living under constant fear from an underworld gang sending threats of kidnapping their ward. Wow! What an idea sirjee! Now you can put your kids in police station and live tension-free. No kidnaps, no ransom-demanding calls. Just live peacefully, do your business/job happily. Salute to our heroes in uniform! So if you are planning a long holiday this summer, take your kids to the police station in your area, pay them the fees (don’t forget to take receipt) and have fun. Our new wardens with high-tech weapons will protect your kids. Who will dare to capture your kids from the police station?

If you have other ideas about how our police can help us, share here.

Jai Hind…